


Ghostbusters

by Alexa_Piper



Series: The Earth Kept Spinning - a series of generally unrelated oneshots set after Phantom Planet [6]
Category: Danny Phantom
Genre: Gen, Identity Reveal, backdated fic, but nobody knows Danny's identity, post-PP, sort of a crackfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-20
Updated: 2019-03-20
Packaged: 2021-03-01 22:07:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,295
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23824309
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alexa_Piper/pseuds/Alexa_Piper
Summary: Jack and Maddie find the ghost kid passed out on their kitchen table after a very long and hard night of drinking at the Christmas Truce party.
Series: The Earth Kept Spinning - a series of generally unrelated oneshots set after Phantom Planet [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1716541
Comments: 14
Kudos: 199





	Ghostbusters

Christmas mornings in the Fenton household were never a quiet experience. They typically began somewhere between three and five am, when Jack woke up and attempted to drag everybody downstairs to where their tree would be shedding pine needles all over the carpet in the living room. There would be gleeful screaming and usually something had already been set on fire before the sun even had a chance to rise, and it wouldn't be until breakfast that the first argument would begin. The day would then devolve into naps and family visits and far too much food, and by the time it was all over Maddie was always grateful that the holiday was only once a year. Besides, teenagers in her house meant an end to the magic, and then Jazz had left for her further education and the only person who bothered with the cookies and milk was Jack.

She wondered if this was what it was supposed to be like to watch your kids grow up - bittersweet.

Jazz had been snowed in at uni, all flights grounded, and it was impossible to drive there in the weather. When Jack dragged her out of bed at four thirty on Christmas morning Maddie paused outside her daughter's door and pressed her hand against the smooth painted wood. A painful little wedge had driven its way into her heart, and she sighed. "Next year," she whispered in the stillness before the dawn.

Jack had continued on to Danny's door, pausing to find it ajar. "He's not in here," he informed her, brows drawing together like closed curtains.

The bathroom door was open as well, the space beyond it dark and uninviting. "I'm sure he's downstairs already," she responded, even though it was against the family rules to go near the tree until everyone was together. "Maybe he went to get a drink of water."

"Maybe it was a GHOST!" Jack shouted, pointing to the staircase in an exaggerated fashion. A light gently glowed from down below. It was warm and familiar and she found herself smiling as she was tugged down the stairs.

Despite Jazz's empty bedroom, they could still have a good day.

Jack stopped so abruptly that she almost walked into him. "Mads," he croaked.

Maddie stepped around her surprised husband, feeling her jaw drop open before she could stop herself at the sight of the person passed out at their kitchen table.

Phantom's face was flushed green, he had a paper crown on his head from one of those cheap Christmas crackers, and his black suit sparkled as though he had been rolled in glitter. His head lay flat against the scarred wooden tabletop, a light snore wheezing through his lips with every inhalation. Cereal was scattered across the table, and it looked like he had been trying to pour it into a glass instead of using a bowl.

"Is that…?" Jack breathed.

Maddie nodded numbly. It was definitely the Ghost Kid, passed out and reeking of alcohol with a string of tinsel wrapped around his neck like a scarf. The fact that neither of the Fentons reached for their guns was testament to how much they'd changed over the past couple of months, ever since Phantom had saved the entire world from an asteroid that should have destroyed them. He had never told them who had been before he died, no matter how many times the media asked, but it still just didn't feel right to keep hunting someone when he had saved the entire world. Even if that someone was a drunk ghost passed out at their kitchen table at four thirty on Christmas morning.

The next snore was louder than the others and its sound was enough to spur Maddie into action. "Phantom!" she snapped, striding around the table and shaking one of his shoulders.

He grunted but otherwise didn't stir, and Maddie forewent the shaking option in favour of something more satisfying. He'd probably be annoyed with her but the sight of a worldwide hero in such a state filled her with irritation. They had invited him to join them for their Christmas activities - since he was, y'know, _dead_ but somehow still mentally sound enough to actually portray emotion and maybe even feel lonely - but he had said that he had a Ghost Zone party to attend, so at least she knew where he had been to get into this situation. He'd probably managed to fly back through the portal but stopped for a snack in her kitchen before passing out, and Maddie could only imagine what would happen to Phantom's international image if this appeared online. Hopefully nobody had managed to catch him on camera…

She tipped the dry cornflakes out of the glass to join the rest of the scattered cereal on the tabletop and filled it at the sink before moving back to the ghost and tipping the entire glassful onto his face.

Phantom swung his head up, teetering back in his chair. He would have fallen if Maddie didn't grab his shoulder, but she pulled back as soon as he was steady in case he forgot where he had chosen to pass out in his drunken stupor.

"Ghost _busters!"_ he hollered.

"Phantom!" she snapped as he slammed his hands down on the table.

"I ain' 'fraid o' no ghost!" he slurred, twisting in his chair to squint at her.

Jack whooped from where he still stood in the kitchen doorway. "Mads, he's _drunk!"_

"I can see that," she responded, the corners of her mouth tugging into a smile despite herself.

"A _ghost_ is _drunk!"_ Jack reiterated, grinning like he'd just received the best Christmas gift ever. "He's affected by chemicals!"

Excitement buzzed through her thoughts, sweeping away any lingering irritation. "And emotions come from chemicals," she mused, looking back at the ghost who seemed to be trying to frown at her in confusion.

"Who ya gonna call?" he mumbled.

"If I knew your parents I'd call _them,"_ she told him, "and you'd be grounded."

His face twisted into a pout. "But Mum," he whined, "'s _Christmas._ "

For a second there he was far too familiar, and those eyes could have been blue. Maddie shook off the feeling. "I'm not your mother, Phantom," she said, tugging on his shoulder again. "Come on, let's get you in a real bed."

He seemed confused as she pulled him to his feet. "But… you're m'mum…"

"No," she told him. "You're a ghost. I'm a ghost hunter. We're just friends."

Phantom scowled. "'M a Ghostbuster, _you're_ a Ghostbuster…"

"Ghost _hunter,"_ she supplied, towing him in the direction of the door. Phantom was unsteady on his feet and leaned most of his surprisingly solid weight on her. "Jack, could you go pull out the fold out section of the couch? I don't think he can manage the stairs right now."

Before Jack could move Phantom held up the hand that wasn't slung around her neck. "Wait," he mumbled, "gotta… I ain' 'fraid…"

Something bright flashed near Maddie's waist and she dropped the ghost onto the floor, instinctively jumping out of the light in case it was something offensive.

"No ghost…" Phantom insisted, frowning as he stared right at the two hunters from where he lay on the scuffled linoleum. "No ghost…"

The light around his midriff split, travelling over his body and sweeping away the suit that she had always seen him wear. Jeans and an ugly reindeer sweater with a flashing bulb for a nose took its place, the tinsel staying where it was and the white hair under the paper crown turning from white to deepest black.

"No ghost," Danny slurred again, sitting up groggily while the glitter covering his skin and clothes sparkled in the light. "Ghost _buster."_


End file.
